SL041 Introduction to Sleeping

This subject will give you all the background you need to sleep your way through first year. Topics covered will be: lecture theatres and their relative comfortness, dealing with monotonous voices, and how to administer valium. Major assessment consists of a three hour sleeping exam which is undertaken during the screening of a pornographic film. No notes are permitted into this exam. No sleeping is allowed during this class.

Prerequisites

SL040 Sleeping (Definition of)

Co-requisites

The student must be undertaking at least one other subject, which will hopefully serve as a practical class for SL041.

AB101 Absenteeism for Engineers

This is an elective that is blocked against SL041. It offers a logical alternative to sleeping in lectures and weighs up the advantages and disadvantages of failing to attend class. The three major assignments include: pressing the snooze button, hangovers, and general laziness. Note: A role will be marked at the start of each class and 75 percent of your final grade is attendance.

Prerequisites

AB100 Theory of Absenteeism

Co-requisites

The student must be undertaking at least one other subject, which will hopefully serve as a practical class for AB101.

VB999 Fluid Mechanics (of Alcohol)

This is an extension of fluid momentum (FL170) which is usually studied in first year. Although FL170 is a prerequisite, it is recommended that first year students residing in a college take VB999 in conjunction with the specified subject. This subject aims to give the average Australian drinker an understanding of how alcohol affects him/her and why they can’t understand anything in this subject. Credit toward this subject is available for certified alcoholics.

Prerequisites

FL170 Fluid Momentum

Co-requisites

AD465 Managing the Pub Environment

AD465 Managing the Pub Environment

An in-depth subject that looks at the issues that may arise in a pub environment and how to deal with them. This is primarily a boxing class but it is accredited by the Faculty of Management. This subject MUST be undertaken if the student is enrolled in VB999. The university does not like to teach information and fail to warn the student of the consequences. Group presentations must be given on one of the following topics: deciding who’s shout it is, deciding which dollar is next in line on the pool table, and optimum locations for imminent regurgitation.

Prerequisites

AL005 Alcohol and its Uses in Society

Co-requisites

None

SX069 Accounting 1

This is a false subject name that covers up for the illegal content contained within this class. Prices range from $2/hour to $500/hour. Call reception and ask for Mr. Pimpessio.

Prerequisites

None

Co-requisites

None

CC100 Should I really be at Univeristy?

No.

Prerequisites

At least two years of your course must be completed

Co-requisites

CC300 Should I be at the Pub Instead?

CC301 Yes. Yes you should. Go, quick, before happy hour’s over!